5.30.2013

Only Child

When the hubby and I first discussed starting a family we were positive that we would be a family of three, having one child was on the agenda for us, and we were not too sure if more would be in our future.  After having so many challenges conceiving we were then convinced that one child was in the cards for us, since we weren't really sure how lucky we could get twice in a lifetime, or if we would want to go through the ordeal another time around. 

We both come from fairly large families, I'm the oldest of four girls, and Gianni is the middle child of three.  So growing up surrounded by children was a commonplace for us, and I'm actually a little convinced that our adverseness to having a large family stems from that.  We also wanted to be able to provide for a child, and give them everything we could, including private education if possible, and being able to travel, adding more children to that equation makes things a tad more difficult.

I am a very plan-oriented person, and I like schedules and routine.  Not that the occasional spontaneity isn't nice, just more often than not I like to have a plan with any situation I go into.  With motherhood I have realized that plans can still exist, but they are only a rough guideline, and you need to be able to bend the plan as much as possible.  So I'm bending the plan.

We are definitely going to have more children.  At least one more, for sure, I'm even open for a third, yup hubby you read that correctly.

We didn't even make this decision recently, now that the new parenthood fog is gone, and we aren't confronting sleepless nights.  Lucas was exactly 3 weeks old, so it was in the thick of things, when you're up all the time, and you're not sure yet what is causing the crying, so you walk, and swing, and try everything in your arsenal to get your child to calm down and sleep.  One night we had just finished giving Lucas a bath, and he was dewy skinned from the water, and his hair was all mussed from the heat, and he had just finished yelling through the whole ordeal of getting dressed, but then we picked him up, and he looked at us, and we all just had a moment.  I stood there with my son cuddled in my arms, and he was silenced by the comforting words we were singing to him, and I just knew that he understood he was safe and happy now. 

We looked at each other and just knew that we had to do this again.  There was so much love between us in that moment, in that child that we had longed and prayed for, and we couldn't phantom the thought of not having another.  All the reasons to have just one child were meaningless, when you look into the eyes of something you created, there are just no words.

We have an idea when we will be expanding our family, but for now we enjoy all those precious, silent and often not so quiet moments with our first born, and thank our lucky stars that he made us parents.

 
 


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3 comments:

  1. This is so SPOT on. I love this post!! My Husband and I always knew we wanted more than one child. My Husband told me, though, that he didn't want anymore than two kids. Now that our 2nd is 14 months, he's changed his mind. He's already started talking about "when we have another kid"! I can't tell you how happy this makes my heart. Children are the most precious thing in the world. I'm not saying I'm going to have 10 kids or anything, but I totally know the feeling of looking into your babies eyes and feeling overwhelmed with love... and that moment, feeling like "Wow, this can't be my last kid"!

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  2. He will be a lucky little boy to have at least one sibling. I never wanted to have another child after being pregnant and having a difficult delivery with my son, but after a year or so we decided it would be worth it to give him a sibling. Now that my daughter is three months old I am convinced we are done having children, but I do see myself perhaps regretting making any permanent decisions when I start missing the baby stage in a year or so.

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